The basic unit of a family that is made up of a father and a mother and children has a bond that binds them together to create an atmosphere of love, peace, security, and belonging. It is the right of every child to enjoy parenting of both parent when growing up but the unfairness of the world have made it not possible for some children who are brought up by single parents (Byron, p.67). This creates a gap in their life and a desire to be fulfilled since the mother or the father figure is missing. This makes the child fill incomplete and develop a feeling of neglect which when not dealt with at early stages can be disastrous (Quinlan, p.380).
A study conducted in America has showed that there is deficiency of the father factor in many families since out every three children, one of them live in homes where the biological father is absent. This makes the children to grow up with an endless search for identity and their true parents who mostly get to find out the truth of the complicated issue too late (Gina and Hall, p.23). The paper seeks to find out how one can overcome the issue of absent fatherhood and live a normal life like other children.
In the television series Vampire diaries there is a lady character named Elena Gilbert who was brought up by other parents other than her real parents. She was always on the search of the thru biological father whom she discovers and realized that she disliked him. Since Elena had a connection with the vampire world she was to be sacrificed but her father offers himself to be sacrificed instead of her daughter dying. She spends the rest of her life finding her real identity and tries to uncover the truth, this is one of the major effects of having absent fathers since the truth cannot be revealed by anyone hence the tiresome search for it by any chance that presents itself. The search becomes complex and Elena is involved in a love triangle which she learns that Stephan and Damon his brother had vampires powers which helped them connect and would help Elena uncover the truth (Bonnie, 2013). This shows that knowing the roots of the parenthood issues by understanding the species of people who share the same characteristics could help fatherless children find the true identity of their fathers (Edward, 2012).
Researches show that children raised up by single parents develop aggressive behavior that makes them behave in manner that depicts them as ‘bad kids’. This rebellious attitude is funded by the fact that there is no father voice that dominates in the children life and since the loving character of the mother, the child develops the rebellious attitude. The mother is torn about the well-being of the children as well as the disciplinarian of the family. This makes the child take the advantage of the situation since there is nobody to curtail his or her freedom (Guy, p.34).
In the book series, Elena is depicted as a bad girl character who is a selfish popular, and a mean girl. The television series helps the girl overcome the character to become nice and relatable. The connection and relationship between Damon and Stephan helps Elena to connect with his roots of her childhood and the mystery of her character who helps her into understanding her identity as a vampire (Andy, 2012). This shows that connecting with the right friends who understand your identity can help overcome the absent father syndrome.
Paulson, Keefe and Leiferman (p.258) claims that, studies have shown that being involved in busy schedules and avoiding being idle are major contributors to overcoming the stress that are funded by absent fathers. It has been noted that getting the mind busy will deny the lonely thoughts that face many fatherless children; this helps the children to be productive and build themselves rather than trying to search for the hidden truth, which may be hurting. Education provides the best opportunity that fatherless children can embrace and get the information that would enlighten them on issues about fatherhood and family issues at large. This will deny the chances of peer pressure and drug abuse which mostly affects fatherless children. In vampires diary Elena was helped to overcome the effects of fatherless upbringing since her life was involved with very many incidents and happenings hence she did not have time to fall in to depression.
National Fatherhood Initiative (2004) states that, the understanding of knowing the real father does not always bear sweet fruit can help those fatherless children to focus on building their life rather than being involved in a fruitless search.
The search may lead to children getting hopeless and developing a revengeful attitude that can ruin their lives since the information revealed is not favorable to them. After a long search for Elena, it dawns to her that the man who was disguised as her uncle John and whom she disliked much was her real father; this did not gratify her search rather it hurt emotions. The moral lesson of these is that fatherless children should avoid the struggle to unveil the truth about their fathers but should concentrate with their future since it has little contribution to their future. This would help many children from emotional and psychological disorders creating a good environment to be more concerned about their future by leaving alone their dull past behind. This is a helpful manner to cope up with fatherlessness in the families.
Bronte-Tinkew, Horowitz and Scott (p.614) allege that, many children who are brought up in fatherless families they do not have a true value of relationships and they are mixed up between making the right choices and compromising at the same time. These children are mostly involved in different relationship in search of some hidden aspect of love which is hard to get in the relationships. Elena is involved in a relationship with Stephan whom she deeply loved with at the same time is interested with Damon whom she believes she has connection with her identity. She is torn between following her identity or following her emotions and desire; this is a crossroads that many fatherless children find themselves in (Gabriella, n.d). Elena dies before making the relationship decision clearly. This can point to the children who are fatherless not to be torn in between searching for identity but focus on their heart feelings and desires since it can help them make informed decisions which could help them progress in future.
Since the issues of fatherlessness issue has faced and affected many families in the world, it should be addressed with seriousness. The issue affects many children negatively and leads them to drug abuse, peer pressure, early pregnancies, emotional disorders as well as psychological problems. How to overcome fatherlessness should be addressed in schools since it is where the children are introduced and dealing with the issue early could help solve some major problems surrounding the absent fathers issue.
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